hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
