No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
