do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
