Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
