At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
