i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Randomize
