What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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