Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Blow job season was short but glorious.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
