I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
