Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
we're making bets on your personal life
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
