even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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