What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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