WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
