ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
