so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
