well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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