I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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