I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize