he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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