I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
