Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
