So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
