Nicole vs. Life
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
