After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
