I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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