And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
