people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
