I'm drive I can fine osifer
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
its liver damage thursday
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
