so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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