I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
did i walk over a car last night?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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