If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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