it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
There's even glitter on my cock...
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