are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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