just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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