I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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