why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He's on the porch naked. Help.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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