Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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