i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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