Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
