was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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