marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
