Non-Jews are for practice
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
