no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize