my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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