they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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