I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
