There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize