After last night, I could never be a politician.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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