This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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