What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
