can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
