hell yes lets make some ravioli
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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